I don't think it's fair.
I think everyone should have the same pain percentage.
It isn't fair...it can make the people who live with more pain have problems with being sympathetic, compassionate, considerate.
It makes us look like heartless bitches.
Oh, your vacation got cancelled? I just got raped.
Yes, it is upsetting that your vacation is cancelled. It might be the most awful thing you've ever had to handle. For you, that's pretty high up there on your pain scale.
However, when I think about percentage.....Rape wins.
Your boyfriend broke up with you? My boyfriend broke my arm when he pushed me down the stairs.
You have a headache? I can't walk.
Your mom won't let you go the mall this Saturday? My mom won't talk to me.
Granted....it sounds like one of those situations where "my horse is bigger than your horse...." but in my mind it's far more complex than that.
I think I look at pain like....Janga?
That game where you pull the little blocks out from under each other.
Every time something bruises your heart, we'll pull out a block or two.
I've lived through enough shit that I just have a hard time feeling compassionate. I just can't bring myself to do it. I wallow and pout and once that's over I suck it up and move on. Like nothing happened. I just try to brace myself for another block to be ripped out and hope it's not the last one.
I look at other people's Janga towers.....
The people I really really know and I think it's not fair. That they have more blocks left than me.
That they stand a little taller and a little stronger than me.
That I've been pulled apart and it doesn't look like they've been touched.
It makes me seem like a cold heartless person.
And I hate it.
That's all.
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